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Amiga Games Extra 1996 September
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Amiga Games Extra CD-ROM 9-1996.iso
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spiele
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publicdomain
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blimey
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blimey.docs
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Wrap
Text File
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1992-09-02
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9KB
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263 lines
Now what are you doing here then? Lets be honest
for just a few brief moments, and just forget the
wider perspective of the eternal quest for self
knowledge. Why are you reading the docs?
1) You're unbelievably bored.
2) You want to find out more about the full,
controversial, and just plain awesome version of
Blimey. If so good for you.
3) You got confused and selected to load this by
accident. What are you? Stupid or somthing. Thank-
you and Goodnight.
Plot: Oh dear. These are always embarassing....
It's a hard life being a highly reactive, sub
atomic particle. One minute you're flying around
the ether, hanging out with y' mates, down the pub
every night, hopping off to clubs to dance the
small hours away and generally having a laugh
riot. The next you've collided with a bloody
electrophile and you're stuck in a long term
covalent bond, with 700,000 decaying Isotopes to
support. Life's a Bitch. So you play one of a
multitude of particles who have suceeded in their
desperate bid to maintain independence in the face
of a lovingly chaotic universe, and eventually
gained the moral maturity to realise that there's
more to life than hanging around getting a few
laughs, so set out on a spirtual journey to
confront every aspect of humanity and share in
every single emotion. Like you do, y'know.
Instructions: These are the guidelines for using
something.
Instructions for Blimey:
Right, If you're reading this it means that
you've loaded the game, and just don't understand
what the F*** it's all about, and need my help.
So, at the most intrinsic level I can be as
facetious and abusive as I want. But, being a self
confessed nice guy, I won't.
(p.s. That is a lie. See Team 4.5 Commandment#2..)
Basic Gameplay: You control one of up to four
highly reactive, experience hungry particles
looking to survive in a highly hostile (read
fatal) universe. Also you don't "like" each other,
so spend your time in the morally unjustifiable
pastime of ramming into each other, to attempt to
force each other into either the death zones or
the viciously electronegative white particles. If
you succeed then your opposition number will loose
a "Life" in traditional, conventional and utterly
unforgivably conformist manner. When all your
opponents have lost all their "lives" then you've
won a "point". First one to 3 wins is the victor,
and has Team 4.5's express permission to gloat,
sneer and generally be obnoxious to all your
fellow gamers (in the world). Each ball has a
limited ammount of "Shield", which is activated
by holding down the fire button. When in use the
particle is completely intangible, which succeeds
in defying all physicians knowledge of sub attomic
collisons, allowing your particle to progress
uninhibited through Death zones, Other players and
just about everything else.Hurrah. Considerable
entertainment can be gained from this social
interaction. Various Tactics are discussed at the
end of doc for achieving Total Overkill of all
opponents. Feel Free to read these, and then not
reveal this information to your Opponents, and so
annihilate them. "We're here to devour each other
Alive",as Hobbesso nobly stated.
Press "P" to Pause. Press "Q" to quit levels.
4-Play is only available to those with a 4-play
adaption. And There is no One player version. For
justification see later. (And observe Team 4.5
Commandment #1)
The Menu:
O.K. I'll take this slowly....
1) You move the pointer around with your
"Joystick". You know. JOY-STICK. JOY-STICK.
Arghhhhh. I Don't know why I bother. If you don't
get this bit how on earth are you going to grasp
the full-on amphetamine charged action of the
game. Stupid, Stupid,Stupid.
2) Now this bit is a little Unusual. To Change
anything, You hold down fire and move the Stick
left and right to modify it. Cool,huh.
3) To Start the game press Fire on the Second
players stick. Or the Mouse. If you want to. You
could just go outside and get some "Mates" round
for some male bonding action, or somthing. Unless
you're female. Then you can't be male obviously.
Not even if you have a sex change, according to
Her Majesties courts anyway.Stupid? You decide.
4) If You want to save your Preferences press
"s". They will now load in every time you load up
Blimey. Hurrah.
And that's it. Except a few of the more obscure
options, namely "Ram Pause". When this is on your
joystick goes dead for about a half-second,
leading to a more intresting game. Oh, you can
still activate your shield to protect yourself.
Team 4.5 recommend not turning this off, but We
thought we'll give you the choice. We're nice like
that you see. Big fans of "Turnoffonability", if
you know what we're saying.
Full Version of Blimey:
Now this is Good. We hate shareware at Team 4.5.
so this offer isn't shareware. You've got a
completely valid game in your possession already.
Keep it, Give it to your Friends or throw it out.
We don't care.
However we're in the position to offer you
somthing better. Much Better. Including all of the
following.
* 70 Levels including 21 backgrounds.
* A "sort of" 1 player mode.
* 3 Sorts of competitions: Best of, First to and
Tournament
* Select different levels for each round of
competition
* And vary the number of balls and their speed on
every level too.
* Animated Bobs (They squish entertainingly)
* Animated explosions
* Several different sets of sprites
* Death Zones with 7 different patterns (with each
set ofsprites!)
* New wrap round function
* Save up to 10 different sets of Preferences, for
speedy selection
* 3 Pieces of Music by the most talented musician
working today.
* 4 sets of Sound Effects
* Intelligent Loading system
* Hard Drive install
* Vary sound levels of music and FX
* Or turn then off individually
* Vary the lengthof the Ram Pause
* Vary Friction levels for each player individually
* Higher levels of shields are able to be set
* Maybe some secret stuff
* Level Designer
* Picture converter (Use your own DPaint
backgrounds)
* Sprite converter (Ditto)
* Attitude
* Swearing (but not gratuitously)
* OR a censored version with nasty bits removed!
* Relevence to real life
* All spread accross two action packed disks
(cliche?)
* All the code for Blimey
* All for a mere £4.50- P+P included
Come on. You know you want to.
Send cheques (or postal orders( or inflatable
penguins for that matter*)) payable to "Team Four
and a Half" to:-
Team 4.5
5,the Brandons
School lane
Stafford
ST17 9EZ
* But with some money as well.
Thankyou. And now for some Wibble.
Team 4.5. Why?: I'm sorry. I think we've used
this joke in a previous doc. So I won't bother.
The Team 4.5 Commandments:
Shamelessly aping fairly good NWONW-punksters
These Animal Men, and furthering our ideal of
being a band rather than a coding team, we've made
4 and a half commandments we're going live our
lives by. They are
1) Four-Play is Important.
2) All men are bastards*.
3) We're secretly Ironic.
4) Never admit your inadequacies
4.5) Thou shalt not place....
Rock 'n' Roll!
Why is there no one player mode in Blimey?
We don't believe there would be any real point to
it. If you want to play Blimey, a game dedicated
to aiding multi-person recreation by yourself it
makes you, oh so very slightly sad. It's like
playing SFII against the machine: You could do it
but it's just an incredibly naff (ooooh good word
that) thing to do. So get your mates round now!
Why is there no Keyboard control?
Alot of thought went into this one: We decided
against it. It makes us angry that people are
willing to sink Hundreds of pounds into graphics
chips and faster processors to make a game look
better but are not even willing to pay a fiver to
make a game more fun. And by making the higher
multi levels of play available only to the people
who have invested in the future of their amiga
we're trying to encourage you to buy a Four way
adaptor. It's worth it, it really is. Just play
Dynablaster to find out why.
Software Artisans?
Programmers who sneer basically. And have full
artistic control over their products, rather than
merely obeying some corparate suited accountant or
market-trend (This means everyone who made a
Football management game). A Programmer sees
programing as a job. A Software Artisan sees it as
a way to Express himself. Thats the difference. I
hope you understand what I'm saying. And I hope
you join us.
That'll do for now.
Thanks for reading, Love C-Monster,
Software Artisan.
"Most Governments, Religions, Institutions,
Weapons of war and general STUPID ideas
Were made by a man.
But not me I was made by a woman."
:S*M*A*S*H